An Attack of GoutAnd I received promotion, not on my own merits, but becausemy master had the gout.
BERTOLOTTIThe reader is perhaps surprised at this free and almost friendly tone;we have forgotten to say that for six weeks the Marquis had been confined to the house by an attack of gout.
Mademoiselle de La Mole and her mother were at Hyeres, with theMarquise's mother. Comte Norbert saw his father only for brief moments; they were on the best of terms, but had nothing to say to one another. M. de La Mole, reduced to Julien's company, was astonished tofind him endowed with ideas. He made him read the newspapers aloud.
Soon the young secretary was able to select the interesting passages.
There was a new paper which the Marquis abhorred; he had vowed thathe would never read it, and spoke of it every day. Julien laughed. TheMarquis, out of patience with the times, made Julien read him Livy; thetranslation improvised from the Latin text amused him.
One day the Marquis said, with that tone of over-elaborate politeness,which often tried Julien's patience:
'Allow me, my dear Sorel, to make you the present of a blue coat:
when it suits you to put it on and to pay me a visit, you will be, in myeyes, the younger brother of the Comte de Chaulnes, that is to say, theson of my old friend the Duke.'
Julien was somewhat in the dark as to what was happening; that evening he ventured to pay a visit in his blue coat. The Marquis treated himas an equal. Julien had a heart capable of appreciating true politeness,but he had no idea of the finer shades. He would have sworn, before thiscaprice of the Marquis, that it would be impossible to be received by himwith greater deference. 'What a marvellous talent!' Julien said to himself; when he rose to go, the Marquis apologised for not being able to see himto the door on account of his gout.
Julien was obsessed by this strange idea: 'Can he be laughing at me?'
he wondered. He went to seek the advice of the abbe Pirard, who, lesscourteous than the Marquis, answered him only with a whistle andchanged the subject. The following morning Julien appeared before theMarquis, in a black coat, with his portfolio and the letters to be signed.
He was received in the old manner. That evening, in his blue coat, it waswith an entirely different tone and one in every way as polite as theevening before.
'Since you appear to find some interest in the visits which you are sokind as to pay to a poor, suffering old man,' the Marquis said to him,'you must speak to him of all the little incidents in your life, but openly,and without thinking of anything but how to relate them clearly and inan amusing fashion. For one must have amusement,' the Marquis wenton; 'that is the only real thing in life. A man cannot save my life on abattle-field every day, nor can he make me every day the present of amillion; but if I had Rivarol here, by my couch, every day, he would relieve me of an hour of pain and boredom. I saw a great deal of him atHamburg, during the Emigration.'
And the Marquis told Julien stories of Rivarol among the Hamburgers,who would club together in fours to elucidate the point of a witty saying.
M. de La Mole, reduced to the society of this young cleric, sought toenliven him. He stung Julien's pride. Since he was asked for the truth,Julien determined to tell his whole story; but with the suppression of twothings: his fanatical admiration for a name which made the Marquis furious, and his entire unbelief, which hardly became a future cure. His littleaffair with the Chevalier de Beauvoisis arrived most opportunely. TheMarquis laughed till he cried at the scene in the cafe in the Rue Saint-Honore, with the coachman who covered him with foul abuse. It was aperiod of perfect frankness in the relations between employer andprotege.
M. de La Mole became interested in this singular character. At first, heplayed with Julien's absurdities, for his own entertainment; soon hefound it more interesting to correct, in the gentlest manner, the youngman's mistaken view of life. 'Most provincials who come to Paris admireeverything,' thought the Marquis; 'this fellow hates everything. Theyhave too much sentiment, he has not enough, and fools take him for afool.'
The attack of gout was prolonged by the wintry weather and lasted forsome months.
'One becomes attached to a fine spaniel,' the Marquis told himself;'why am I so ashamed of becoming attached to this young cleric? He isoriginal. I treat him like a son; well, what harm is there in that! Thisfancy, if it lasts, will cost me a diamond worth five hundred louis in mywill.'
Once the Marquis had realised the firm character of his protege, he entrusted him with some fresh piece of business every day.
Julien noticed with alarm that this great nobleman would occasionallygive him contradictory instructions with regard to the same matter.
This was liable to land him in serious trouble. Julien, when he came towork with the Marquis, invariably brought a diary in which he wrotedown his instructions, and the Marquis initialled them. Julien had engaged a clerk who copied out the instructions relative to each piece ofbusiness in a special book. In this book were kept also copies of allletters.
This idea seemed at first the most ridiculous and tiresome thing imaginable. But, in less than two months, the Marquis realised its advantages. Julien suggested engaging a clerk from a bank, who should keep anaccount by double entry of all the revenue from and expenditure on theestates of which he himself had charge.
These measures so enlightened the Marquis as to his own financial position that he was able to give himself the pleasure of embarking on twoor three fresh speculations without the assistance of his broker, who hadbeen robbing him.
'Take three thousand francs for yourself,' he said, one day to his youngminister.
'But, Sir, my conduct may be criticised.'
'What do you want, then?' replied the Marquis, with irritation.
'I want you to be so kind as to make a formal agreement, and to writeit down yourself in the book; the agreement will award me a sum ofthree thousand francs. Besides, it was M. l'abbe Pirard who first thoughtof all this book-keeping.' The Marquis, with the bored expression of theMarquis de Moncade, listening to M. Poisson, his steward, reading hisaccounts, wrote out his instructions.
In the evening, when Julien appeared in his blue coat, there was neverany talk of business. The Marquis's kindness was so flattering to our hero's easily wounded vanity that presently, in spite of himself, he felt asort of attachment to this genial old man. Not that Julien was sensitive,as the word is understood in Paris; but he was not a monster, and noone, since the death of the old Surgeon-Major, had spoken to him sokindly. He remarked with astonishment that the Marquis showed a polite consideration for his self-esteem which he had never received fromthe old surgeon. Finally he realised that the surgeon had been prouder ofhis Cross than the Marquis was of his Blue Riband. The Marquis was theson of a great nobleman.
One day, at the end of a morning interview, in his black coat, and forthe discussion of business, Julien amused the Marquis, who kept him fora couple of hours, and positively insisted upon giving him a handful ofbank notes which his broker had just brought him from the Bourse.
'I hope, Monsieur le Marquis, not to be wanting in the profound respect which I owe you if I ask you to allow me to say something.'
'Speak, my friend.'
'Will Monsieur le Marquis be graciously pleased to let me decline thisgift. It is not to the man in black that it is offered, and it would at onceput an end to the liberties which he is so kind as to tolerate from the manin blue.' He bowed most respectfully, and left the room without lookinground.
This attitude amused the Marquis, who reported it that evening to theabbe Pirard.
'There is something that I must at last confess to you, my dear abbe. Iknow the truth about Julien's birth, and I authorise you not to keep thisconfidence secret.
'His behaviour this morning was noble,' thought the Marquis, 'and Ishall ennoble him.'
Some time after this, the Marquis was at length able to leave his room.
'Go and spend a couple of months in London,' he told Julien. 'The special couriers and other messengers will bring you the letters I receive,with my notes. You will write the replies and send them to me, enclosingeach letter with its reply. I have calculated that the delay will not amountto more than five days.'
As he travelled post along the road to Calais, Julien thought withamazement of the futility of the alleged business on which he was beingsent.
We shall not describe the feeling of horror, almost of hatred, withwhich he set foot on English soil. The reader is aware of his insane passion for Bonaparte. He saw in every officer a Sir Hudson Lowe, in everynobleman a Lord Bathurst, ordering the atrocities of Saint Helena, andreceiving his reward in ten years of office.
In London he at last made acquaintance with the extremes of fatuity.
He made friends with some young Russian gentlemen who initiatedhim.
'You are predestined, my dear Sorel,' they told him, 'you are endowedby nature with that cold expression a thousand leagues from the sensation ofthe moment, which we try so hard to assume.'
'You have not understood our age,' Prince Korasoff said to him; 'alwaysdo the opposite to what people expect of you. That, upon my honour, is theonly religion of the day. Do not be either foolish or affected, for thenpeople will expect foolishness and affectations, and you will not be obeying the rule.'
Julien covered himself with glory one day in the drawing-room of theDuke of Fitz-Fulke, who had invited him to dine, with Prince Korasoff.
The party were kept waiting for an hour. The way in which Julien comported himself amid the score of persons who stood waiting is stillquoted by the young Secretaries of Embassy in London. His expressionwas inimitable.
He was anxious to meet, notwithstanding his friends the dandies, thecelebrated Philip Vane, the one philosopher that England has producedsince Locke. He found him completing his seventh year in prison. 'Thearistocracy does not take things lightly in this country,' thought Julien;'in addition to all this, Vane is disgraced, abused,' etc.
Julien found him good company; the fury of the aristocracy kept himamused. 'There,' Julien said to himself, as he left the prison, 'is the onecheerful man that I have met in England.'
'The idea of most use to tyrants is that of God,' Vane had said to him.
We suppress the rest of the philosopher's system as being cynical.
On his return: 'What amusing idea have you brought me from England?' M. de La Mole asked him. He remained silent. 'What idea haveyou brought, amusing or not?' the Marquis went on, sharply.
'First of all,' said Julien, 'the wisest man in England is mad for an hourdaily; he is visited by the demon of suicide, who is the national deity.
'Secondly, intelligence and genius forfeit twenty-five per cent of theirvalue on landing in England.
'Thirdly, nothing in the world is so beautiful, admirable, moving as theEnglish countryside.'
'Now, it is my turn,' said the Marquis.
'First of all, what made you say, at the ball at the Russian Embassy,that there are in France three hundred thousand young men of five andtwenty who are passionately anxious for war? Do you think that that isquite polite to the Crowned Heads?'
'One never knows what to say in speaking to our great diplomats,' saidJulien. They have a mania for starting serious discussions. If one confinesoneself to the commonplaces of the newspapers, one is reckoned a fool.
If one allows oneself to say something true and novel, they are astonished, they do not know how to answer, and next morning, at seveno'clock they send word to one by the First Secretary, that one has beenimpolite.'
'Not bad,' said the Marquis, with a laugh. 'I wager, however, MasterPhilosopher, that you have not discovered what you went to England todo.'
'Pardon me,' replied Julien; 'I went there to dine once a week with HisMajesty's Ambassador, who is the most courteous of men.'
'You went to secure the Cross which is lying there' the Marquis toldhim. 'I do not wish to make you lay aside your black coat, and I havegrown accustomed to the more amusing tone which I have adopted withthe man in blue. Until further orders, understand this: when I see thisCross, you are the younger son of my friend the Duc de Chaulnes, who,without knowing it, has been for the last six months employed in diplomacy. Observe,' added the Marquis, with a highly serious air, cuttingshort Julien's expressions of gratitude, 'that I do not on any account wishyou to rise above your station. That is always a mistake, and a misfortune both for patron and for protege. When my lawsuits bore you, orwhen you no longer suit me I shall ask for a good living for you, like thatof our friend the abbe Pirard, and nothing more,' the Marquis added, inthe driest of tones.
This Cross set Julien's pride at rest; he began to talk far more freely. Hefelt himself less frequently insulted and made a butt by those remarks,susceptible of some scarcely polite interpretation, which, in the course ofan animated conversation, may fall from the lips of anyone.
His Cross was the cause of an unexpected visit; this was from M. leBaron de Valenod, who came to Paris to thank the Minister for hisBarony and to come to an understanding with him. He was going to beappointed Mayor of Verrieres in the place of M. de Renal.
Julien was consumed with silent laughter when M. de Valenod gavehim to understand that it had just been discovered that M de Renal was aJacobin. The fact was that, in a new election which was in preparation,the new Baron was the ministerial candidate, and in the combined constituency of the Department, which in reality was strongly Ultra, it wasM. de Renal who was being put forward by the Liberals.
It was in vain that Julien tried to learn something of Madame de Renal;the Baron appeared to remember their former rivalry, and was impenetrable. He ended by asking Julien for his father's vote at the coming election. Julien promised to write.
'You ought, Monsieur le Chevalier, to introduce me to M. le Marquisde La Mole.'
'Indeed, so I ought,' thought Julien; 'but a rascal like this!'
'To be frank,' he replied, 'I am too humble a person in the Hotel de LaMole to take it upon me to introduce anyone.'
Julien told the Marquis everything: that evening he informed him ofValenod's pretension, and gave an account of his life and actions since1814.
'Not only,' M. de La Mole replied, with a serious air, 'will you introduce the new Baron to me tomorrow, but I shall invite him to dine theday after. He will be one of our new Prefects.'
'In that case,' retorted Julien coldly, 'I request the post of Governor ofthe Poorhouse for my father.'
'Excellent,' said the Marquis, recovering his gaiety; 'granted; I was expecting a sermon. You are growing up.'
M. de Valenod informed Julien that the keeper of the lottery office atVerrieres had just died; Julien thought it amusing to bestow this placeupon M. de Cholin, the old imbecile whose petition he had picked up inthe room occupied there by M. de La Mole. The Marquis laughed heartily at the petition which Julien recited as he made him sign the letter applying for this post to the Minister of Finance.
No sooner had M. de Cholin been appointed than Julien learned thatthis post had been requested by the Deputies of the Department for M.
Gros, the celebrated geometrician: this noble-hearted man had an income of only fourteen hundred francs, and every year had been lending sixhundred francs to the late holder of the post, to help him to bring up hisfamily.
Julien was astonished at the effect of what he had done. 'It is nothing,'
he told himself; 'I must be prepared for many other acts of injustice, if Iam to succeed, and, what is more, must know how to conceal them, under a cloak of fine sentimental words: poor M, Gros! It is he that deserved the Cross, it is I that have it, and I must act according to thewishes of the Government that has given it to me.'